Sunday September 20th 2009

I woke up early and was already not looking forward to the day. Took the kids to the zoo, we did have a good time but as I feared, every family, every couple I saw had my mind swirling as it does every time I go out in public now. All I seem to be able to do is wonder, fantasize, and imagine what the day would be like had she not passed away, how much she would be enjoying the kids and the moment as she always did. I envy every Family I see. I know God had his reasons and I really do accept that, and yet I still question why. Not just a simple why, but a thousand why’s, it seems thousands of times a day. It consumes my mind to the point of making everything else around me a blur. The biggest question facing all of mankind, is there life after death??? Well, I have always believed, even through the worst of times. This is where faith comes in, it gets me through most days???? Well, all said and done, I survived taking 10 (2 friends) kids and they all had a good time. Now its time for Sunday night baths and homework. I think I must sign 2-3 new things a day from the schools.